On Men’s Need to Know They are of Normal Penile Size


A recent academic study that looked at studies of over 15,000 men worldwide has found the answer to the age-old question of how big an average human penis is and the answer is 9.16cm flaccid and 13.2cm erect.

Phew! Now we know. Men from all over the world are now able to rate their penile length to an objective study in order to ascertain if they are normal or not.

I was interested to hear the results of this study and to watch the inevitable light-hearted or sometimes even comedic reaction to it. One article actually compared both sizes with household objects, presumably for those without a ruler, and found that it is exactly two wine corks long growing to three when erect. Such comparisons are not only useful aide memoires but they also help as a tactic to avoid talking too closely or heaven forbid, looking at the male penis directly.

Such jovial responses to the subject are to be expected on a subject so intensely central to men’s sense of their masculinity, especially when men are not encouraged or keen to discuss such private matters. This was something I also found with my own research when I asked men about their levels of happiness with their penis as part of a section which aimed to explore the effect of the female gaze on men’s self esteem.

One of my findings that most interested me was that men had no external reference point to compare themselves too, which was something that was troublesome. Not only were men previously to this study unable to “know” themselves and where they fitted in the great scheme of penis things but also that this is troubling in another way, in that masculinity has often invoked science as a support and hitherto there has been no support to be found.

Rationality has long been shown to be a gendered (as opposed to the historical ‘humanist’) concept as is most obvious when women are told to “calm down” or “stop getting so emotional”. One can look at the lad’s mags of the 1990’s, the rhetoric of the Pick up Artists – both of which cherry pick from science to support their ideals – or more generally, men’s wider interest in science (and passing it on to boys) as both a genuine interest but also as a performance of masculinity.

Knowledge is revered over emotion, which is seen as getting in the way; the head must learn to get control over the body; these are historic ways that men have approached the world and tried to organise it. Take the philosopher Descartes for example, who distrusted all the senses and foolishly tried to eliminate all knowledge that could not be traced back to the intellect alone.

The men I interviewed showed some concern that they were unable to rate their penises “objectively” but also a desire to be within a normal range. The trouble was that not only was there no clear definition of normal, they could not admit to having an active interest in how their size compared to other men. This was because such an interest could be misconstrued as being too close to other men, which might result in them being considered to be gay, and we all know how such a threat polices men’s everyday behaviour.

It is strange that we live in a culture when male homosexuality is becoming increasingly accepted, yet men still can’t proffer information about other men’s penis size for such a reason. Whether it is from pornography or from standing adjacent to other men at urinals men do in fact see other men’s penises with some regularity (in the UK at least). Yet none of the men I interviewed ever mentioned knowledge of other men’s parts. How could it be the case that men don’t glean such information from sideways glances or peripheral vision, especially as boys?

I think the way the men answered my questions is an interesting example of how men negotiate their personal concerns as part of their public masculine performance and how tricky this is for them. Thankfully now a group of (mostly male) scientists have done the dirty work for them, so they now have a secure source of such information that neither threatens their masculinity by means of getting too close to homosexuality or by not being able to explain something rationally. Time for a couple of bottles of wine to celebrate, or maybe three…

About annaarrowsmith

I am Britain's first and most acclaimed female adult film director, with lots of scenes written, directed and produced by myself and several awards under my belt. After 2 decades of production and distribution experience, I recently completed a PhD in Gender Studies that focuses on men's experiences of women's power in dating relationships. I know an awful lot about film-making and about gender. You might have seen me in the British media...
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1 Response to On Men’s Need to Know They are of Normal Penile Size

  1. Tom says:

    I am a man, and I can admit it here. I do glance at other men’s penises whenever the chance arises. Obviously checking out how I compare. It is hard to compare that way, by discretion. One just doesn’t want to be caught peeking. I’ve seen some of my friends’ penises and I can’t say I’ve felt unusual. My main concern however is erect size and how a partner would respond. Countless hours of research online has led me to believe that size is of somewhat importance to most women, when it comes to sexual pleasure. With detailed descriptions on how bigger is better. With that in mind it is hard to not feel sexually inferior. Knowing that my size most likely will be less valued than a bigger penis. It’s soul crushing. I think men wants a partner to love what they have, and not any less than a bigger penis. It seems like the lower you go on the penis size scale, finding such a partner becomes harder. Who knows where the cut off is. Men whose size is around the average brought up in this post will most likely have some size insecurities, and for good reason. Women seem to enjoy and feel more pleasure with bigger than average penises. So having an average sized penis (according to the one stated here) you’re disadvantaged.

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